Hey people who don't exist, or those that might stumble across this accidently, or creeper parents.
its been a while.
but i'm having a thought. and its the answer to the question that nobody answers, so we are all are hit hard by it when it happens to us.
Its the cultural and social norm to push our children and youth to reach for their dreams. we see people rise to occasions and become heroes. we know people want to become rock stars, movie stars, chess club stars, whatever. but do you ever wonder why people like celebrities are so CRAZY!? Its because nobody ever told them what to expect once they GRASPED THEIR DREAMS.
What happens when you have reached your dreams? what then?
It has always been a dream of mine to play softball in college. i refused to go to a UW college because there's no good softball. i didn't just want to play, i wanted to be the best i could be. i am 21 and still have a little itty bitty speck of a dream of being a professional athlete. being an adult teaches me better than that, and that is not where i am called to be, but i still smile a little when i daydream about wearing a USA jersey. but anyway. i journeyed. i struggled, i never gave up, i didn't let anyone, especially my coaches, tell me that i was not good enough. i showed them all up. i went from being a nobody, a bench player, a bullpen catcher, to a major force, with a team high OBP and a pretty dang good batting average...until my end of the season slump. but i rounded out at a solid .333. i would say, i fulfilled my dream. when i look back on everything, it is staggering to see the progress that i made. my years were full of hard work, perseverance, commitment, and courage. i kept my integrity in situations i wasn't expected to, i made hard decisions when i needed to. i showed up.
so why am i still unsatisfied? i asked that question during my rise this past season. i started out saying, i just want a chance. i had goals, i had a god-glorifying foundation, i had good intentions. then things started happening. it went from i just want my chance, to i just want to be an asset, to i just want to start, play defense too, to i just want to catch... every time i stepped up, i wanted a bit more. so i think my end of the season slump was inevitable in some ways. the more you overthink, the more you start to make mistakes. i couldn't come back down from my towering ladder that i had to keep climbing. but i don't think that is why i am unsatisfied. through all of this i realized the reason why i was unsatisfied was that none of this matters. Softball is a game. it will end. there will be a time where i won't be able to say, "i will do better tomorrow." Softball is of this world. the experiences i have had through softball brought me to where i am and i am thankful for every minute of that. but softball didn't bring me here, God did.
the point of all of this is that reaching for you dreams is NOT the most important thing in life. You reach for your dreams and you work hard for them. BUT MAKE SURE THAT YOU HAVE GOD SIZED DREAMS, or else they will NEVER satisfy in the end. i struggle daily with being satisfied in fulfilling my dream. Fulfilling your dreams will not make you happy, but fulfilling God's dreams that he gives you to bring glory to the kingdom, will fulfill. They will bring you the joy and peace that you crave.
the thing about God sized dreams though, they usually take a lifetime to fulfill. You keep working. "never, never, never, give in - except to convictions of honor and good sense." - winston churchill
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